Wait!? I can pick my own topic!? NICE....

Two things are weighing on my mind a lot lately....divorce and Vietnam. Odd? Ya, I know. The divorce thoughts are not even directly because of the one I was so blessed to be a part of (snicker snicker) but moreso that of a few of my friends. I hear stories and my mind wonders back to a time when x, y, or z happened to me too. I am so disappointed in the husbands of these relationships and yes, I realize I am only getting one side of the story. I've also realized that the reason I am only getting one side is because only one person is telling me. LIGHTBULB MOMENT: My friends didn't necessarily pick a side in my divorce...perhaps, we picked it for them.

Anyway, that's entirely drab, so I will go on to my next topic. Vietnam -- further...what led up to the conflict, why the United States got involved and what the American people were told. I've always been very interested in the Vietnam war. Partly because it wasn't so long ago and the media has trash-hounded it like mad with movies, books, plays, songs (you get the picture) and partly because there were so many social implications that followed our involvement (and I'm a bleeding liberal heart). I felt I had a decent grasp on what went on over there but craved an unending desire to learn more.

uh, scratch that last part....

I have to take a history class for ASU -- the only general education requirement different than U of A's apparently -- and i figured "there's no better time than now to learn about something I'm actually interested in." (Take that as you will considering I'm enrolled in classes to get my BSN in Nursing...) So, I enrolled in HIS 456: The Viet Nam War.

This class is INTENSE. It's a 7 1/2 week course which spans from the 1945-1975. I know many of you don't realize what that means. It means in 54 days we will have to grasp what happened in 10.950 days (feel sorry for me yet?) It means we are studying the era from post WWII (the French involvement with Vietnam...Communism vs Nationalism) all the way through the increased involvment of the U.S from 1954-1964) to DIRECT US involvement in 1965 through the blood bath and political rhetoric from 1968 - 1973) and then post war ramifications from 1973 - 1975. (side note: it leads up promptly to my birthday....hehehe a good time to end the class...in 1975).

^I just learned that...not copied from my syllabus....really.^ Kinda impressed with myself.

Anyway, we are studying the time when Johnson and his government decided to quietly lie to the American people about why we were getting involved the way that we were --more than just financially, but by actually putting B52s up in the sky and our soilders on the ground. (I find it VERY interesting that this lying and manipulating led him to win another term of Presidency against Goldwater -- a staggering win of 62% or something -- when Johnson was taking all the steps to do JUST what GOLDWATER was saying needed to be done -- to ESCALATE war tactics...ugh, frustrating)

You guys, this was WAS SO CORRUPT from the get-go. At every turn there is misinformation and false promises. It is disgusting.

No, I won't bore you with politics or waritics (i like that term...just made it up) but I will say studying this class has hurt my brain -- and my heart. It has made me really THINK about the wars our country has been involved in, especially this Iraqi War of late. We are all fucking sheep. Sorry for the F bomb mama...it's true. We listen to the presidential speeches and read the scholarly articles in newspapers and magazines around the world -- what it comes down to -- we are not PRIVY to shit as far as information. If anyone truly believes that "their candidate" will follow through on the promises he/she makes on television (while wearing the perfect suit, perfect smile, having the perfect speech and perfect cookie cut hand wave)...you are delusional. WHO CARES WHAT THEY SAY! We will never know the chess moves they are playing. We will never truly understand the motives -- for each person carries different ones. We will never understand the true implications and cost -- because there is an argument everywhere you look "based on facts." We will NEVER know the lives that have been lost, the mismanagement of funds, warfare and power. We will never know about the laws broken, the treaties untrought (not a word but I'm rolling....) It's TERRIFYING! The best we can hope for is some teeensy bit of truth and some person at the helm believing we can be a better country because of x, y, and z.

It scares the shit out me. A lot of my disdain is because my husband is a US Army Veteran and very proud of his time overseas and I get paralyzed with fear thinking about it. I always assumed to be in the military you have to be a bit of a sheep....but I think THOSE men and women know more then we do -- then our neighbor does, than our damn President and Congress knows. WHO VOTES FOR THESE PEOPLE!! I'm just scared to death...

I have so much more to share....but I need to enjoy the 73 degree, beautiful Arizona Spring day....

...more to be continued...I assure you.